You can Improve Your Love Life! – By Debra Jarvis

So you want to improve your existing love life, you’d be happy to have even the merest wisp of a relationship or you are looking to replace your existing one.

Lets have a look around your home. What images do you see on a daily basis, singles, trios, pairs at either end of a mantelpiece? There is your answer right there! Most of us are looking for a relationship with one significant other creating a pair. Ensure the images you see on a daily basis reinforce what you do want.

One young man, George sat down every morning to eat staring at a picture of a crow sitting on a branch of a dead tree in the desert. Carolyn had a statue of three naked women dancing in a circle and Marilyn had lots of pairs, they were either spiky, dead or located at opposite ends of the shelf or room where they were displayed.

A girlfriend of mine put up a picture of two 1920’s Flappers. A few weeks later she and I flew across the country in our best frocks to stage an event to help men and women to improve their love life – not quite what she had in mind.

Feng Shui considers bedrooms to be the second most important spaces in our homes, the first being the entranceway where opportunity is welcomed in. To change your current situation, first create the opportunity for change. Use your front door on a daily basis, preferably when you enter and leave your home, too many people find themselves in a clandestine back door affairs!

Locate items you love, that welcome you at your entranceway. Place a pair of objects or hang a picture with an image of two that signifies connection, and that are in rapport with each other. Make your entrance “Feel Good”.

The focus of the bedroom should be the bed. In your bedroom, the place where you sleep carefully select all items as they are the last thing you see at night before you go to sleep and the first thing you see in the morning when you awake. In the time I have been consulting it is apparent that the bedroom is often one of the most neglected areas of our homes. The lounge, dining and outdoor entertainment areas all look great, the bedroom, what does it matter no-one ever looks in there. Well it matters (very much so) you see it and you are the most important person in your life!

Bedrooms are our most intimate environment! It is the space which is exclusively ours! Only very special people get invited in. They are our sanctuary, our place away from the world, activity here is private, intimate. We are free to indulge our wildest fantasies, to be nurtured and rested, to indulge our senses. Love Your Bedroom!

Your bedroom is for intimacy and sleeping. Get the books, television, computer and crafts out of there. Remove other ancillary items such as equipment related to other activities. Don’t keep the laundry basket or a rubbish bin in your bedroom either.

Replace pictures of parents, children and friends with ones suggesting romance and intimacy. Ensure mirrors are kept to a minimum and avoid positioning them so they reflect the door. Remove excess pillows off the bed as energetically they occupy space, preventing your ideal mate from entering.

Create an inviting bedroom, somewhere you want to go rather than purely functional. Bring in candles, massage oil and romantic music. Ideal colours are pinks, crèmes, reds, oranges, mid browns, yellows, whites and pastels. If you don’t particularly care for a colour then choose one you do love. When selecting sheets stick to flesh tones, think womb, safe, nurturing.

In one clients bedroom, the predominant colour was chrome and the major feature a shiny silver padded bedspread (imagine the walls of a futuristic space station). Her complaint was, he was never home. Her focus was on “Modern”. We live in the 21st Centaury, we want spaces that are modern, comfortable and welcoming. This room felt cold and uninviting. No passion or romance forthcoming here.

Under my guidance and with the help of an interior decorator, Michelle and Robert transformed the bedroom, they introduced paintings in pastel lilacs to the walls, a bowl of bright petals was placed on the blanket box at the base of the bed and the bedspread was replaced with one in purple and red hues. They love their bedroom, Robert is home in the evenings and Monday is their designated day they spend with each other. They are enjoying many more activities together and regularly eat out. They have recently brought a luxury apartment, are currently holiday overseas and they both have big smiles every time I see them which is usually on Mondays!

Do you have room for someone in your life? Time and Space? Significant others require time and energy commitment, they are not “Kennard’s Hire”, you can’t turn them on and off like a tap when it’s convenient to you. One client implemented the ideas sprinkled throughout this article and discovered (after several short flings) that she didn’t actually want a relationship in her life, and she chose to love her live as a single and stopped lamenting to her friends about the lack of a man.

Energetically create the space for your Significant Other. Sleep on one side the bed, allow at least 30% of draws and hanging space for your partner. If you have bedside tables and lamps, have two, one for you and one for them. Buying new furnishings such as a recliner, get two. Place a dish in a convenient location for their keys and loose change. Let them know you are happy to have them in your life.

Decorate the bedroom to reflect your ideal relationship. Hot Pink for passion where he looks after you. Purple is for passion on both sides, Crèmes, and mid Browns for a solid, dependable committed relationship. Soft Pink for lots of Romance. Red and White for a contempory relationship with great sex between between intellectuals.

Burgandy and Maroon are for a traditional relationship with the Man calling the shots while the Woman spends her time in either the Bedroom or the Kitchen.

Avoid greens and blues in the Bedroom as these tend to cool off relationships. And on a final note Black Satin sheets are excellent for the single guy (or gal) who desires a steady stream and variety of attractive sex partners.

How’s my love life? I flew home a few weeks later from that event I put together with my girlfriend, to start my new life as a single, waiting for me at the airport, was the man who is today my partner, lover and best friend.

Marilyn realised her relationship was over, they were leading separate lives, it was toxic, dead and so she decided to take action and dumped all the objects representing what her relationship had become. Her husband moved out and Mr. Right moved in. Marilyn came to understood that people come in and out of our life for a period of time so we can learn and grow from each other. When it is time to move on, we have come to a fork in the road and love allows us to let go, so we can each experience joy and attract that person who is right for us now.

Carolyn was sick of the threesome she found herself in and replaced her statue with a pair of love birds. Several months later she called by my office to show me pictures of her most recent trip and tell me she was now traveling all over the world with her new articulate, devoted, handsome lover.

George dumped the dead tree and crow picture which was from his student days and only hung up, because “there was a hook there”, replacing it with a picture of lovers on a picnic in the country. Today he is happily married and often drives into the country on picnics with his family.

It is possible to attract that special person into your life! Decide what you really want and be open to the wondrous ways and forms that he/she shows up in your life!

Enjoy the companionship of your soul mate on your journey of life. May you both experience Much Joy and Many Blessings, Debra.

© 2006 Debra Jarvis

About the Author
Debra Jarvis, Grad WSFS, Popular Seminar Speaker and Trainer, Author of the widely acknowledged, easy to read and practical book "ABC of Feng Shui" http://www.debrajarvis.com.au/books.php

Increase Your $$$ and Improve Your Love Life!
Consultant to Achievers (Business and Individuals) seeking that extra edge. Debra has an informative website, e-newsletter and live seminar program. Visit www.fengshuimiracles.com.au  to tap into these resources,

Interested in hiring Debra to speak at your next conference or seminar, e-mail her personally debra@fengshuimiracles.com.au
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