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Happiness - The 'secret ingredient' for Attracting Your Ideal Partner

Michelle Stanton - Life Coach and seminar leader - talks openly about love and romance.

Would you prefer to spend your life with a happy person - or - with an unhappy one?

Are you happy? Would your ideal partner enjoy spending their life with you?

If you are looking for your ideal partner, the first step to attracting this person into your life is making the decision to be happy. 

Many of my course participants are surprised at how easy it is to be happy. That happiness is a decision, and it can be learnt! Most of us have been brought up to believe that something out there, some event or circumstance needs to happen for us to feel happy. The good news is that this is NOT true! When you are happy, events and circumstances "out there", reflect back to you how you are feeling inside. It only appears to be the other way around…

When you have made the decision to be happy, you are 99.9% there! The rest is purely reinforcement. Helping you to keep making the decision to be happy in every moment.

To help you understand this point, I'd like you to sit or stand up straight, look up and grin broadly…(smile even if you don't feel like it)…and try and feel really sad… It's not physiologically possible to sit up, look up, smile and be sad all at the same time! It really is that simple.

Now, to continue feeling happy on an ongoing basis, a little more knowledge is required.
These include:

  • Understanding WHO you are.
  • What you want in life…what is important to you.
  • The mechanics of how to get what you want in life, easily and effortlessly.

As it is not possible to cover all of the above in this article, I'd just like to touch on one area…. 

What do you want in life?…What is important to you?

In order to continue to be happy in life, it would be beneficial to feel fulfilled…to do what feels good…what feels right for us. 

Most children do not have a problem answering the question "What do you want?" The answer they will give you is spontaneous and in the moment…e.g. To go to Disneyland.

Most adults are so used to restricting themselves to what they think they can afford and what they think is realistic, that they have forgotten how to ask for what they want. Most adults have forgotten how to DREAM…the first step in manifesting what you truly want in life.
So, I'd like you to answer these 3 questions to help clarify for you what you would love to do to fulfill you in life.

Q1. If you were not paid to do the work you do, would you still do it?
Q2. If you only had 3 years to live, would you still do the work you do?
Q3. If you won the lottery ($20million), after you have travelled the world, bought your dream house, car, toys etc. what would you do with your time? What would give you fulfilment?

People are attracted to happy, fulfilled people who know what they want. Your ideal partner is no exception.

To help you clarify WHO you want in your ideal partner, invest some time in writing down the qualities you are looking for in your ideal relationship. Include:
  • The type of relationship you are looking for
  • How you wish to feel when they are in your life
  • How you wish to relate, communicate
  • Sexual chemistry, passion
  • Personal growth & spirituality
Ideal partner characteristics:
  • Demographics
  • Interests, hobbies, talents, skills, intellect
  • Values, beliefs, character
  • Physical qualities
  • Age group
  • Finances
  • Marital status
  • With/out children

There is magic in clarifying what you want in life, on paper. Do not be surprised if this person walks into your life in the very near future. Be open and allow them to come in through any door. 

NOTE: In order to keep your ideal partner in your life for the long haul, it would be beneficial for you to develop those qualities you want in your ideal partner, in yourself.

Michelle Stanton is a Life Coach. She conducts courses on "How to Attract Your Ideal Partner" for singles, "In Love for Life" for couples and "Living Successfully in Peace and Happiness" in Adelaide, Australia.

You can email Michelle on
For more information, visit

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