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The Difference Between
Men And Women in Dating and Romance The Differences Between Men and Women: WHAT DO WOMEN AND MEN WANT?The differences between the sexes.
(c) David Newton 1991 - All Rights Reserved
How do I know how to give to my partner's needs?
A very good question. Both sexes have very real and different needs. To miss this question in your thinking, you would be better left alone until you consider it seriously. There is no point in going into a relationship with another person of the opposite sex, particularly with a long term view, without understanding their needs. The problem is that we have ideas of what we think our partner needs which have no basis in reality. Those ideas got there from our own upbringing and the influence of those around us. So what does your partner want? - is it different from you?
The WRITE love?
Some of the things; men and women want in personal columns.
What women want from males:
"Mr Right"......"I need my Knight shining armour"
"I have a high standard of honesty for myself and my partner"
"Nice man"......"Lot richer"...."Good sense of humor"
"I'd love to hear from a sincere, honest, warm, considerate, gentle,
affectionate, intelligent, tall, gentlemen with a good sense of humor"
"Hi! Are you a warm and caring gentlemen?"
"Miss Wright would like to meet....tall attractive classy...."
"..independent and strong person .. wishes to meet her Prince Charming"
" .....must be tall, 5'10" minimum."
"he should be well dressed, elegant, have good manners"
Some of the most common words are; tall, attractive, humor, caring,
honest, warm, intelligent plus the sprinkling of 'Mr Wright',
Prince Charming and the good old 'Knight in shining armour'.
What men want from women,....
"I am looking for a lady....who is open-minded, honest caring easy to
communicate with and good company"
"...she must be passionate about life and have a good sense of humor"
"looking for a young lady who has long hair is affectionate,
fun-loving, caring, trustworthy, as I am also...so if you are as
lonely as I am?..."
"....doesn't matter what the weight is, it's what's in your heart that
heart that is more important."
"Are you a tall, statuesque lady?"
"I am wishing to meet a woman who is attractive, slim, sensuous, intelligent, confident, affectionate, with a sense of humor and is willing to look on the bright side of life"
Some of the most common words are; honest, attractive, tall, passionate, sense of humor, sensuous and affectionate. There seems to be more of an emphasis on the physical traits and fun aspect of living. However, the real wants go much deeper than the just the this. As well as this we tend to switch lovers and attract the traits we missed if the previous relationship failed and also ask for what we liked best in that association. How does this come about?
Can you spot any differences?
Both sexes want the same thing but simply express it in a different way.
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See what the real differences are between the sexes on FriendFinder online.
HOW DO I KNOW?: THAT THIS IS THE ONE?
Check out what you feel.
Love is a decision not just a strong feeling. But how do you look at
all the tings going on your mind and see if this paring is for you?
Follow the list of these questions to assess your feelings;
1. When I am with...... I feel as if I am (smart/stupid, young/old,
beautiful/overweight, worthy/unworthy etc....)
2. When I listen to this man/woman I generally (like/dislike) what
they have to say.
3. After a few hours, I feel with.....that I am (drained/replenished)
4. This person appears to be (loving/unloving, giving/demanding
generous, withdrawn, etc)
5. With this man/woman I can be (my whole self/partial self)
6. We have in common.................................................
7. What we don't have in common......................................
8. By observing this person and their words and actions I believe that
he/she is; (capable of intimacy/incapable of intimacy)
9. I will/willnot be able to grow in this relationship.
10. Generally my feelings for this man/woman are (e.g. loving,
confused, fearful, exciting)
Remember, that you are making a probing look at your own feelings and they can change over time. Use the guide to see where you are and test to make your step on a sound footing. This should not be used to find fault with a partner, it is all about your own feelings!
EXPRESSION OF FEELINGS
Practice saying what you want.
"I want.........." "I need........." "I feel........"
"I prefer.....than to......" "I'm so happy that..........."
"I'm afraid of......." "This is what I see..............."
Get your feelings out into the open. It may take a while at first but even if it is hard to get started keep it going as you will soon deepen your love and bonding between each other. Show understanding...........
Do you constantly guess your partner's mind? Does this get you into trouble? How about some real feeling? Most of us presume that we "know" what is right when we miss the mark by a lightyear. Stop the guessing games and ask! "Do you want to talk about it?"
"Is that of importance to you?"
"What do you feel?"
"Do you want my help in this matter?"
After you ask LISTEN. Resist all temptation to say something smart. Ask for more information. "And what else did you feel?" Get the issue or story out in the open look for more than just the opening lines.
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